Mike's Bump & Run 1

Starting off with the ridiculous and gradually transitioning to the mellow, Mike's Bump & Run is an ongoing series that can be likened to a bastard child of USA Today and The Atlantic Monthly on acid.

Erick Erickson, editor of the popular, ridiculously conservative megablog RedState, conceded that progressives currently enjoy an advantage over conservatives online—though he attributed it to an asymmetry in free time, since conservatives "have families because we don't abort our kids, and we have jobs because we believe in capitalism."

// How true. I can't tell you how many fetuses we had to abort to get The Mainstream back up and running. Plus, we all had to quit our jobs and shred our resumés.

// Re: Pizza Hut's Crunchy Cheesy Crust Pizza. It looks disgusting and delicious simultaneously. Pizza Hut is like the Oscar Mayer of Italian cuisine. While Oscar Mayer invented new meats* (Olive Loaf?), Pizza Hut invents new pizzas. How long until we see a stuffed crust pizza where the crust is stuffed with hot dogs?

// With the release of Step Up 2 the Streets on Friday, can we officially declare "urban dancing competition" a film genre?

// I think I can fart the Price Is Right loser music.

// A critique of sex scenes in American movies that rings so true.

// Celebrities are so crazy now that I'm beginning to think people should stop trying to get famous. It seems that the second you visit L.A. and people start taking pictures of you, your brain shuts off and you start channeling late-life Jim Morrison. Evidence: Lil' Kim.

// Actual television shows in development:
The World's Strongest Celebrity
Celebrity Magician (VH1)
Celebrity Circus (USA)

// It's encouraging to see that the election is such a forefront topic these days, but is being polit-savvy trendy? Is it like being a Red Wings fan in the late 90s or a patriotic American on 9/12? Time will tell. Meanwhile, we've been hammering Hillary lately on the 'stream. If it ain't broke, don't fix it. Comprehensive review of Anti-Hillary slogans.

// The writer's strike is over! When will my shows be back? Check it before you wreck it.

*stolen from Seinfeld