Holy. Effing. Ess.

// Thank goodness for Google News. Google in general, really. I used to wake up and go shower, teeth, whatever else needs to be taken care of, then computer. My iGoogle page (and the embedded Google News) changed all that. I switched up my main order and now I go computer first, then I do the ritual bathe. I find that doing the news first gives me some thought fodder for my shower. The best part of Google News is the email. Accompanied with the iPhone, the emails I receive keep me almostly instantly informed about stories concerning keywords I get to select (over 150 now) at pretty much all times unless I'm inside of a lead building (rare occasions). If you're not doing the Google News thing, I think you're missing out a little bit. The reason I bring it up: one of my key words is "explosion". Like I mentioned before, I get pretty laissez-faire with the keywords I select. While I only have a few tabs in the news widget on my iGoogle page, I get an email alert when any of ~150 words appear. I know it sounds like a waste of time, but it's been a long summer and even the best of us get too bored every once in a while. Regarding the keyword "explosion": a couple of days ago, there was an explosion in a Toronto neighborhood that sounded pretty bad. The story I read stated the explosion happened at a propane plant. When I read it at first, I thought, "Ah, bummer. That must have sucked. A propane plant, too. Good gravy." I recognized the potential disaster of an explosion at a propane factory, but there wasn't much second thought. I really just had too much going on in the noggin. A big golf weekend, USA vs. China bball, hangover recovery protocol; they all commanded more immediate attention. Yesterday, I saw a video of the explosion. I literally said aloud to myself, in a louder-than-it-needed-to-be voice, "Holy. Effing. Ess." Except I said the actual swear words because I'm fly like that. Seriously though, I only make remarks aloud to myself on the rarest of occasions. The trigger has to warrant such an outward display of incredulity. Needless to say, this explosion did just that. Check it:

http://view.break.com/552797 - Watch more free videos
Are you kidding me? Michael Bay couldn't make an explosion that crazy! There's a freaking shockwave! Anyway, the point that I made in 400 words and only needed about 50: get Google (or Yahoo!) News. You don't want to miss a spectacle like this.

// Rocky Top Talk is a college football blog that focuses on (duh) Tennessee. They recently put together a list - among other similar lists - of the least scary logos in college football. For whatever reason I like reading and/or making "top 5" or "worst ever" or any other kind of lists. This one's pretty solid. There's funny little comments. Whatever.

// Paparazzi photography is - in my opinion - pretty out of control. It has gotten to the point where I'm rationalizing some of the crazy antics of celebrities. I imagine that if cameras were following me around everyday, all the time, without rest, I'd completely flip my cookie in less than a month. I'm actually somewhat impressed that I don't hear about more paparazzi beatings. In a way, the impressive thing about the whole situation is the patience of the people being photographed. Sure, there's the occasional smacking of a camera or cuss-fest, but I think I'd be doing much worse. The flipside of this sentiment is the people who would actually enjoy getting their picture taken 5,000 times a day (maybe McConaughey). Either those select few celebs, or the people who would pay for this. The whole idea of this service is so beyond stupid, I'm having trouble coming up with disparaging remarks. Help yourselves.

// The Top 31 Bad Ass Star Wars Moments -- Or as it's now known in my laptop's favorites: F*ck Mountain. Also: here's a less interesting Star Wars link. Why do I post every single link I find that even remotely concerns Star Wars? It's part of the Jedi oath I took when they picked me. Sorry, guys. My hands are tied.

// Funniest thing I've read all month, talking about wimp characters:

I’d add to the list every character played by Michael Cera. The thing that’s wrong with him is that he’s basically George McFly but devoid of the half-nut that made him man up enough to punch out Biff when the chips were down… Michael Cera would totally have let Biff rape Loraine.(source)

// I thought this picture was glorious. Have a good day, turkey toms.